i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
