i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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