i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize