youre lurking in front of me
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
