Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
