so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
