you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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