I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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