super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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