Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I smell stomach acid.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
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