Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
