I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
