do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize