never play flip cup with pint glasses
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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