I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I FOUND THE LEGS
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize