So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'm jealous of your bromance
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
