you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
