your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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