All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
