I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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