the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
