Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
