Soap is not a condiment
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
