Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
