apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
