I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
