Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
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