I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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