i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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