chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
