the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
