Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
