And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
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