you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
