i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
