Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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