I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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