Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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