Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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