We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I just blew my weed a kiss
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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