i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
