I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
