im so drunk with asians
where?
always
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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