Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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