Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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