guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Actions speak louder than pants.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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