He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
i dont even know how to be here
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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