waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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