I wanna bring you to show and tell
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
