i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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