that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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