can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
